The Grant Gurnhill football and mayhem blog.

Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii’m back peeps”! And this ‘ere is me last blog for the week, rounding off me 3 part piss tak - I mean review - of the Prem.
We’ve finally found the hallowed ground at the top o’ table - from 5 to 1. 5 to 1? Sounds like a good name for a quiz show that, dunnit? Be a short bugger though wunnit?
Anyway, in at numero fiveo is Onesie City. Staying ahead of the chasing pack by the tightest of margins, they sit in the middle of the trio of 11 pointers, their slim lead down to having managed to squeak more wins than draws and losses. Still only a GD of 2, showing their defensive frailties of late to slack goals are going to be a pain in the arse for them by season’s end if they keep letting it slip. Scoring more at the other end would go a great way to alleviate the problem, but the frontmen need to start earning their corn on a regular basis if they’re gonna turn it around.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat 4 - and top of the 11 point pile - Man Reunited. Now that Van Persil has managed to relocate the pitch, and the Millennium Falcao is fluking lucky tap-ins, Van Hire’s rejects seem to be getting somewhere at last. No coincidence that dropping Jones the Steam and Christine Smalling from the defence has coincided with a turnaround in Reunited’s fortunes. The Mancs need to be careful though - it’s only 7 games in, The Falcon, Van Persil and Looney are injury prone nowadays, and with so many internationals in the squad, now that the Euro qualifiers are ramping up, it’s only a matter of time before they start to falter. Watch this space.
Amazingly, at number 3, we find a revitalised Louthampton - or Ditherfool Reserves as they’re more commonly known these days. An impressive start - until you consider that the only team with any budget or depth that they’ve faced is Shitspurs. Come back at New Year boys and tell us how good you are…
The bridesmaid of the first 7 games is…drumroll…Mantreasurechester City! A mere point above Louthampton, but 5 behind the leaders, the Blue Mooners have already dropped 7 points in their first 7 games. That is not Championship winning form by any stretch of the imagination. However, the Treasurehunters have been helped massively by the fact that everyone else of note and money has had an even worse start. I doubt if anyone had any doubts (eh?) that this lot and Chelski would be battling for supremacy this season; but a 5 point gap at this point does not look good, especially when Mourinho’s muckers are making such a strong fist of the title race already. After defeating Arse-nil - the only other unbeaten team at that point - they have held onto an impressive 19 out of 21 points, and are looking like if they all played blindfolded and bound, the ball would somehow still find its way into the opposition net off Diego Costacoffee’s knob. The guy is a phenomenon. I have to admit to doubting his ability to keep his temper, and to hit the ground running; but the bugger’s proved me wrong (once in a lifetime ain’t bad!) as he’s streaked past Usain Bolt and is racing down the Golden Boot straight already!
So as I tip my hat to the Stamford Bridge blues, I take my leave of you all, and head off back to bed. And Barbie.
Now where’d I put that lube?
For my aching leg muscles of course…
Tata for now peeps!